Last Updated on

Communication, Motivation

12 Things Highly Confident People Don’t Do

Written by Carol Morgan
Dr. Carol Morgan is the owner of HerSideHisSide.com, a communication professor, dating & relationship coach, TV personality, speaker, and author.

I think some people confuse self-confidence with having a big ego. It’s almost like they think that if they love themselves, then other people will think that they are stuck-up and unlikable. I couldn’t disagree more. I always say that truly confident people don’t need to go around telling people how great they are because they don’t need to. People automatically notice their greatness from their positive behavior. Here are things that highly confident people just don’t do:

1. They don’t judge or make fun of other people.

When someone is confident, they want you to be confident too. Confident people are loving people. They want to lift you up, not tear you down.

2. They don’t seek attention for the sake of attention.

They may have an outgoing, life-of-the-party personality, or they might be quiet and shy. But even if an extrovert has high self-confidence, they don’t need the attention. They are fine if they receive it, but they don’t go actively seeking outside validation because they have already validated themselves. And that’s all they need.

3. They don’t brag about their accomplishments.

Confident people are proud of their accomplishments. And they truly want to help people. But they do the things they do because they have passion for it. They don’t have a “Look at me! Look how awesome I am!” attitude.

4. They don’t spread negative energy.

People want to be around them. They ooze positive energy. Contrary to the “energy vampires” of the world who do nothing but suck the life out of you, confident people add to you; they don’t take away.

5. They don’t only talk about themselves.

Confident people are genuinely concerned about others, not just themselves. They ask questions. They offer suggestion and advice if they are asked. They make conversations and relationships a two-way street.

6. They don’t over-complicate things.

They don’t make mountains out of mole hills. Confident people try to act calmly and rationally for the best of all concerned. Sometimes that includes simplifying things so that problems can be solved with a “team” mentality, not a “me vs. you” mentality.

7. They don’t focus on what they don’t want.

If you only focus on what you don’t want, you’re only going to get more of what you don’t want. Confident people know that. They look at the bright side and have a grateful heart. They set goals, hold up a positive vision of their desire, and then they take action and go after it.

8. They don’t act full of themselves.

Confident people never project an attitude. Instead, they project kindness and warmth. They smile and laugh. They want you to feel good about yourself, instead of telling you how great they are.

9. They don’t break their word.

When someone breaks their word, it disappoints other people. Confident people know this. They don’t want other people to feel bad. Their intention is to lift up other people, so they make sure they do everything they can to do what they say they are going to do.

10. They don’t shy away from failure.

Highly confident people know that there really is no such thing as failure. There are only learning opportunities. And when the failures, or learning opportunities, come along, they know that they will be better for it. They don’t judge themselves negatively. They simply say, “thank you for the lesson” and move on.

11. They don’t waste time on things that don’t matter.

Confident people know what really matters in life. People matter. They prioritize time to spend with loved ones because it’s what life is all about. They also don’t sweat the small things. They put things into perspective and have an appreciation for everything.

12. They don’t focus on the negative.

Generally speaking, confident people are optimists. They are happy. They look at what is good, not what is bad. They focus on what can go right, not what can go wrong. They don’t dwell in negativity. Instead, they see the positives in every situation.