We all groan at the thought of that dreaded time of the year – the big clear out. And we always wonder how we accumulate so much worthless junk every single year. Until we’re going through it all and we realize that actually, it’s the same junk we went through last year. Well folks, it’s time to clear out for real this time. Save yourself some pain and this year, actually get rid of your useless clutter.
1. No regrets
We’re all afraid we will throw something away that we will one day regret chucking. If you haven’t worn it in the last year, honey, you ain’t going to wear it to the pub on Friday, don’t fret. The more you squash into your cupboards, the less each trinket will mean, anyway.
2. Avoid multiples
When we come across that picture frame, painted with pink splotches (is it a bird, is it a plane..?) our hearts melt for that treasured classroom pride of our younger selves, or perhaps we beam with pride all over again for that mother’s day gift from our child. But do we already have those paintings from art class, that lamp made in tech, and a whole storage box full of terrible art work…? Keep the pieces that are the most memorable to you.
3. You’ve still got your memories
It’s hard to let go of those old cinema tickets from the first boyfriend or that broken retro alarm clock that Nan passed down to you. But just because you get rid of the item, it doesn’t mean that you’ll suddenly forget that you dated the guy or what your dear old Nan looked like. Trust that if it’s important, you’ll remember it.
4. The waiting game
If you’re struggling to part with that furry mink body warmer because, you never know, it could come back into fashion. Or it could make a killer werewolf costume at Halloween. Well that may be true, but equally, it could not come back into fashion. I mean how long are you willing to wait? Don’t put it off until the next clear out. CHUCK IT.
5. Shopping spree time
When you’re really struggling to chuck out the old videos (you don’t even have a working VHS machine anymore…) and that tacky waving kitten on the windowsill, comfort yourself with this thought: there’s a whole world of shops out there, just waiting for you to buy new, modern items, that actually work and are still sold.
6. Do your bit
A lot of this stuff doesn’t have to go in the skip, either. None of it has to be a waste. When you remember how you dragged Billy Goat around the house tied to your little finger, so he could feel like he was flying, think of all the fun he could have with a new kid in a new house, and all the good that money could do for Oxfam, CRUK, the British Heart Foundation – there are so many great charity shops to choose from.
7. Don’t panic
Remember: these are all just things. They have value and we’re human so we get sentimental. But there are photographs for that and sometimes, it isn’t healthy to invest so much in a horrendous tacky rocking horse. So be brutal and get it the hell out of your house.
8. The future’s bright. The future’s empty.
And if none of that is enough to keep you shifting it all out the window, well then, we bid you – think of all that space. Ladies and gentleman, I have a dream, where closets are empty, rails are filled with unused coat hangers, desks are usable because they are not covered in junk, boxes have absolutely nothing inside them and there are no more ‘organised’ piles of things in the corner of the room. The future’s bright. The future’s empty.
Featured photo credit: Slurpiesandstraws via flickr.com
