You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.
But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.
Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!
Therefore what does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption and a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.
What is Considered Quality Time?
Quality time is a love language that revolves around showing love and affection by dedicating time to spend together. If your love language is quality time, there’s nothing that screams “I love you,” like undivided attention from your loved one. According to Gary Chapman, the developer of love language theory, spending uninterrupted time with someone deepens the connection.
Quality time is also about physically expressing love. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!), but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]
How to Spend Quality Time With Your Partner
Here are some signs from Gary Chapman that show that quality time is important to you. And it’s your primary love language:
- Feeling lonely when you don’t have ample time with your loved one
- Spending time with someone is more important than gifts, touch, or acts of service
- Postponed dates and other activities upset you
- You get turned off sexually when you don’t spend quality time with your loved one
- You feel disconnected when you don’t spend enough time together
- You feel hurt when you feel like someone isn’t listening to you
- You are focused on making schedules work
So how do you spend quality time together with your partner? Here are 14 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.
1. Attend a Social Gathering
Today, most people have busy professional lives and forget how to have a great time with their loved ones. While you don’t have to attend all social events and family gatherings, you should schedule a time to enjoy social moments together and appreciate your loved ones for their love and personality.
2. Try New Things Together
Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydiving or ballroom dancing?
Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?
Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.
Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]
3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time
Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?
Many couples phone snub one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]
Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.
4. Hit the Gym as a Couple
One way you can spend quality time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together. [4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo.
One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compared to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]
Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.
5. Cook Meals Together
Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!
One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]
Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.
If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.
6. Have a Regular Date Night
Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.
The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.
Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 58 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples
7. Be Interested in What They Are Saying and Feeling
All love languages are aimed at helping loved ones connect through different means. Quality time takes the form of conversation and discussion in most instances. This shouldn’t be confused with words of affirmation or validating language. Presence is key.
Show interest in what your partner is feeling. Let them tell you how their day was. As your partner speaks, listen actively.
According to the National Library of Medicine, active listening is the highest and most effective level of listening, and it is a special communication skill. It requires listening for the content, intent, and feeling of the speaker.[9]
Limit distractions and avoid interrupting them. Listening to them and acknowledging their feelings will make them feel loved.
8. Avoid Canceling Plans
As we said earlier, people whose love language is quality time feel hurt by postponed or canceled plans. This is because they see quality time as a sign of love. When you cancel or postpone spending time with them, they feel like you are withholding love.
While plans change from time to time and everyone needs to spend time alone, ensure that you let them know how you enjoy spending time with them and that you look forward to the next event.
9. Have a Daily Ritual
It could be taking a walk in the evening, having dinner together, or having a hobby you both enjoy, such as hiking or journaling. Finding something to help you spend time together, even if it’s only 15 minutes. It will pay off in spades in the long run.
10. Go to Bed Together
If you live with your partner and your schedules allow, you should consider going to bed together. Not only will you end the day together but also connect before sleeping. Research shows that a bedtime routine is associated with increased family functioning and improved sleep habits. [10]
11. Plan a Weekend Getaway
When you are working hard to advance your profession and achieve your career goals, planning a holiday is not one of the things that come to mind. While long holidays guarantee quality time, a small weekend getaway can also work. All you need is a few days. When you have a weekend, find a nice destination and get away.
12. Try a Movie Marathon
If you don’t like going out on the weekend due to personal preferences or a tight schedule, you should try out a movie marathon. Write down all the movies that you both like and start watching them. This will help in creating conversations and memories. In the end, it’s the time you spend together without talking about work that counts.
13. Play Video Games Together
Everyone has an Xbox in their homes, thanks to rapid technological advancement. And most of them have multiplayer games and features. If both of you enjoy playing video games, you should try this out. You can keep things exciting by awarding the winner.
According to Sage Journals, families with poor family communication benefit more from co-playing than those with effective family communication. [11]
If you haven’t been spending time together lately, playing video games is a good idea. Bringing the child within both of you to life is the key to happiness.
14. Get Intimate
We cannot emphasize enough that quality time is the key to success and happiness in relationships. Another aspect that cannot be ignored is having a great sexual life.
While all days aren’t equal, don’t allow work pressure to drain life out of your relationship. Lack of satisfaction leads to separation. When you are scheduling quality time, don’t forget your sexual life.
Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone, which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[12]
Final Thoughts
The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:
- Improves emotional and physical intimacy
- Lowers divorce rates
- Improves communication
- Reduces marital boredom
- Bonds couples closer
- Improves friendship
- Boosts health
- Reduces stress
These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.
It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.
These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.
Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com
