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Communication, Motivation

10 Signs That They’re Toxic Persons, Even Though You Don’t Feel Like It

Written by Alicia Prince
A writer, filmmaker, and artist who shares about lifestyle tips and inspirations on Lifehack.

They’re Controlling

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    A sizable indicator that someone is a toxic person is if they are overly controlling. Though many of us have controlling tendencies, there’s a difference between someone who likes things tidy and someone who tries to manipulate the people close to them. If you feel somebody trying to pull your strings the person in question is probably not the best for you.

    They’re Jealous

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      Another way someone can be a toxic force in your life is by being constantly jealous of your accomplishments. The people you are closest to in life should be overjoyed each time you succeed, so if you feel like you can never share good news with this person that should be a red flag.

      They Lie

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        Unsurprisingly, toxic persons are often frequent liars. Whether this person is telling large or little lies, it doesn’t matter. If you frequently catch someone lying to others, there’s a strong chance they are also lying to you. People who have the greatest positive effect on us are people we can trust, so keeping someone who is dishonest around will inevitably be a drain on you.

        They Play The Victim

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          Another way toxic persons can be harmful is by always playing the victim. Although these people may be convincing as to why a situation is far worse for them, if someone constantly claims to be the worst affected by life it can be a sign they are not good for you. Someone who is toxic will consistently ask others to give more than they themselves are willing to give.

          They Gossip

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            Another hallmark of toxic persons is a zest for gossip that’s a little too strong. Not only does overly frequent gossip show that someone will rarely converse with you about things of substance, gossip is also usually fiction. If you are constantly around someone who’s a constant gossip it is likely they have the same lack of respect for you. Not only that, only talking about other people is tiresome and boring in the long run, so you are probably better off without them.

            They’re Greedy

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              Another way toxic persons negatively affect our lives is by being greedy. If someone close to you only has regard for what they gain in every situation, you are likely the one who will be constantly shortchanged. This might not bug you at first, but over time, getting the short end of the stick will take its toll.

              They Always Come First

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                In a similar way, toxic persons usually only consider themselves. If the person in question never seems to find time for you (but you are constantly willing to help them), it’s a huge indicator that their time is more important to them. Another way someone only considers themselves is with a lack of concern for your well-being. If you frequently check in on them to see how they’re doing, but they show little to no regard for your state of wellness, it’s likely an unhealthy situation.

                They’re Negative

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                  Being overly negative and judgmental is another way toxic persons give themselves away. No matter what you try and do with this person, it will always be less than what they wanted. Especially when unforeseeable problems arise, this person will complain to no end, let it completely ruin their day, and predictably blame you too. No matter how well an evening goes, it will always be too busy, too expensive, too much traffic, not enough fun, or not exciting enough. When you find someone’s negativity consistently interferes with your ability to have a good time, it’s likely time to move on.

                  They’re Arrogant

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                    Similarly, toxic persons are often also very arrogant. They will see themselves as the smartest person in the room, and the only person capable of carrying out tasks. Perhaps their constant negativity stems from this arrogance, as it seems they always know the “right” way to do things. A person can only handle so much ego, so if you find yourself consistently put down next to this person, chances are they are an overall negative force for you.

                    They’re Always Right

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                      Finally, toxic persons frequently try to dominate every conversation. Since they think they are the smartest person in the room, everyone else must be wrong. With toxic persons, small, humorous conversations will quickly escalate into violent arguments. You can also forget about them ever considering your point of view since their point of view is fact. When somebody sees a conversation as a challenge they must win it’s nearly impossible to have a healthy relationship. In this way, moving on from friends who are toxic is crucial in life to feel self-assured, free, and capable.