A relationship is a fickle thing. One day you can sit next to your significant other and think that it’ll last forever and then the next day one of you is dodging fragile (and often expensive) objects being hurled at your skull. Being happy is one thing, but knowing you have a solid, lasting relationship is something else entirely. Here are some signs that you’re in a relationship that may go somewhere.
1. You help each other
It’s something you two just do. One of you cooks and the other cleans. One of you does the laundry and the other puts it away. I’m not saying that you guys need to complete each others sentence or do this kind of stuff all the time, but there are things around the house and in life that you each take care of so the other doesn’t have to. In my relationship, when we order a pizza, I’m always the one who calls the pizza place because my girlfriend hates talking on the phone. It may not be big or always obvious but it’s something you do so often that it’s become second nature.
2. You’re on the same page
When you aren’t with the right person in a relationship, you two have different priorities. You may be focused on a job while the other wants to have a baby. Your significant other may be into getting drunk and having fun and you’re starting to feel ready to settle down. When you’re in a relationship that could go somewhere, these sorts of things simply don’t happen. Settling down (or partying it up) sound like a good idea to both of you. Birds of a feather flock together.
3. You communicate
If you ever watched How I Met Your Mother, think of pretty much every conversation Marshall and Lily ever had. Relationships that are going places also include two people who talk about things. We’re not talking about your favorite movies or songs. We’re talking about the important stuff like life decisions, good feelings, and bad feelings. Couples to talk together, stay together because they work out the problems before they become serious.
4. You can both admit it when you screw up
We are human beings and that means we make mistakes. It’s one thing to make the mistake but it’s another to admit you made the mistake and then attempt to fix it. Now, there’s a line as to how bad a screw up is before it’s too bit of a screw up. Getting irrationally angry at a small thing can be fixed but if your partner physically harms you, that’s something you probably shouldn’t forgive (and no one would blame you). Which brings us to our next one.
5. You don’t make “those mistakes” and you don’t want to
There are “those mistakes” that you can make that are more or less unforgivable. Hitting your partner, cheating on them, stealing money, etc all fall into the category of things that people generally don’t get over. In a relationship that may go the distance, these kinds of issues simply don’t exist because no one wants to be in a relationship with someone like that and if you want that other person around, you wouldn’t ever want to do that kind of stuff to them.
6. You and your partner are in control of your relationship
This sounds like common sense but you’d be surprised how many relationships allow external forces to control things and that’s not always a good thing. It’s one thing when a friend expresses concern for your happiness but it’s another altogether when they try to control your life. This goes for parents too. Yes, it’s true that they brought you into this world but when you turned 18, you became your own person. In a lasting relationship, things like controlling parents and friends are things that both of you deal with and you don’t let it get to you.
7. When it’s broken, you fix it
These days, people break something and just throw it away and buy another one. While this attitude is perfectly fine for things, they are not okay with people. No relationship is perfect. Things ebb and flow. There will be good times but there will also be bad times. When the bad times happen, people in a lasting relationship figure out the problem, and then they fix will fix it. Throwing things away is for your broken iPhone, not for your loved one and when you’re in a lasting relationship, you know that.
At the end of the day, everyone’s relationship is unique. We’ve tried to identify the base line stuff but the fact is that people get along in the weirdest ways so even these may not always apply to you. If you can make it work, then you know how to do it!
Featured photo credit: Lowe and Behold via loweandbehold.net