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Communication, Relationships

20 Keys To Have An Incredibly Happy Relationship In Today’s World

Written by Thai Nguyen
Thai's a Mindfulness-Meditation Coach, a 5-Star Chef and an International Kickboxer.

How many times have you heard your grandparents throw out the phrase, “When I was your age…” When they inevitably complain about the price of movie tickets, you realize that there is much more that has changed in the world. Ticket prices does not even scratch the surface.

The current generation is experiencing a turbo-charged, technologically advanced world like none other. The world is literally at our fingertips. Social media has made geographical spaces nonexistent. Yet with all the development and the ability to be more connected than ever, the National Health Statistics Reports show that the number of failed relationships has barely changed over the past couple of decades. So if our world is providing us with the best resources to have the happiest lifestyle, why are our relationships not reflective of these improvements? The way we interact in our relationships has fallen behind the times and needs to catch up!

Here are 20 ways to have an incredibly happy relationship in today’s world.

1. Boast About Love.

Not only can you let that special person know how much you love them, but you can also tell the whole world. Nothing is sweeter than seeing a public declaration of love — everyone loves seeing a romantic proposal video go viral online. Don’t be shy, the world needs to see more love.

2. Daily “Us” Time.

In the hustle and bustle of the daily rat-race, your relationship can easily become lost in the crowd. Make your relationship a priority by carving out daily time for one another. It may just be a phone call, but do not let the relationship get strangled by all the busy-ness.

3. Keep The Change.

The ancient Greek saying, you never step into the same river twice, still rings true today. Change is inevitable. In fact, you can bank on change being the one thing that never changes. The person you fell head over heels with that first day will grow and evolve. And so will you. Understanding that, and growing together, is the key.

4. Stop The Social Stalking.

Let’s be honest: this is unfortunately as prevalent as the midnight chocolate binge but far more damaging to your happy relationship — stalking your ex on social media. It is an awful habit that does nothing but undermine the strength of your relationship. To avoid constantly sticking your hand in the cookie jar, get rid of the cookie jar altogether. If you truly value the current relationship you are in, delete the temptations to be a creepy stalker and play any comparison game.

5. Be Vulnerable.

The alpha personality that dominates today’s culture and leaves no room for vulnerability may be effective for the corporate world, but it is detrimental for relationships. Do not let your work attitude seep into your personal relationship. Be vulnerable and share your feelings and emotions with one another. Build that trust.

6. Space Out.

Step out of each other’s pockets and give yourself some alone time. If you have to go a day without seeing one another, then let that happen. It is ok to disconnect from being so connected. Give each other the space you need. But also be sure to tell one another that you need that time- ignoring will just make things worse.

7. Exclusivity.

The monogamy vs. polygamy debate can get heated. However, an extensive online search of relationship studies and journal articles will reveal the statistics favor monogamous relationships. A Clark University poll of over 1000 18-29 year olds found that 86% desired to have a marriage that “will last a lifetime.” The search for that one soul-mate still rules and is shown to equal a happy relationship. The is no greater scar than that caused by infidelity and cheating. Do not even entertain the thought. Make the clear verbal commitment to one another: regardless of how the relationship unfolds, you will commit to being exclusive to one another.

8. Forgive.

Nobody is perfect. We live in a constantly improving world, but not a perfect world. Prince Charming and Cinderella are merely figments of idealistic imagination. But even if they were real, they would still need to forgive one another. By all means, express that you have been hurt, but be quick to tell one another that you accept their apology. Kiss and make up.

9. Back To Reality.

As entertaining as many of today’s romantic movies can be, they can also be very damaging in the message or picture they convey about the ‘ideal’ relationship. On one end you have tear-jerking providential perfection of A Walk To Remember, on the other end the catastrophic one-nighter portrayals from Wedding Crashers. Perfection on one end, pollution on the other. Be careful not to find yourself with lofty fairytale expectations, nor become miserable with idea that no relationships work.

10. Just Listen.

With so much information available today to solve any problem, it is easy to jump in and feel as though you need to always be a problem solver. Your partner may just need to vent and you just need to simply listen. As helpful as all the “How-To” guides are, God gave you two ears and only one mouth for a reason.

11. Get Old-school.

Remember the last time you received a hand-written letter in the mail? Probably never. But those that have will recall it being pretty special. With almost all communication being digital, be a little different and write your loved one a hand-written letter. You could even go out and get something called a stamp and mail it to it!

12. Fight.

As paradoxical as it sounds, there are healthy elements in disagreeing and working toward a resolution. Even fairytales involve conflict. You may have heard the saying, “couples that fight together, stay together.” Arguing is actually an effective form of communication, conflict identification and resolution. Of course there is a huge difference between constructive forms of arguing and destructive forms. If your fighting simply leads to nowhere, or it is sparked simply out of spite, then that is a different story.

13. Cook Together.

There are so many options for restaurants to eat out today. You can get almost anything even delivered to your home. Great bonds and conversations happen over any meal. Greater bonds and conversations will happen as you get to cook together.

14. Use Technology.

Take advantage of technology. If you are traveling it doesn’t mean you have to neglect the time that you would spend physically with one another. Have yourself a virtual date. Have fun and even get dressed up!

15. Enough’s Enough.

One of the dark sides of technology’s constant connection, is the difficulty in cutting off relationships that really need to be cut off. However, technology does help in allowing you to block the person from social media. Just be aware of how easy it is to be connected, and STAY connected. The earlier you can cut off a bad relationship, the better.

16. Spontaneity.

We live in a world filled with options. With so many choices for activities and attractions, why not be spontaneous and do something random and new? Have a date night at the theatre, look for a cheap flight and motel and go away for the weekend.

17. Public vs. Private.

People forget that when they post something online, it become very public and is almost impossible to take back. If you have something you are not sure about saying that relates to your partner, do not go and post anything on a social media site for the world to see.

18. Get Physical.

As opposed to always being virtual. With the ability to have video chat, video messages, text messages and phone calls, do not neglect the most import form of communicating: face to face and in person. Be careful not to let technology actually distract you from seeing each other physically.

19. Send A Gift.

With a click of a button you could have a dozen red roses sent to the other side of the world. Why not go ahead and put the biggest smile on your partner’s face and send them a box of chocolate, some roses and a romantic note?

20. Learn Something Together.

You can learn pretty much anything on Youtube. Pick something that the two of you are interested in and learn it together. It could be a musical instrument, a language or a sport. Encouraging one another is a sure way to build a strong and happy relationship.

If you have found that your relationship has become a little dusty, outdated and bland, go ahead and give it an incredible happiness boost with these 20 different ways!